I CAN'T!

  How many times have you said that?

When my daughter was a cheerleader one of her coaches made them do pushups anytime the phase "I can't" was used. 

The other day in my Sunday School class one of my students said, "I can't...." No, I didn't make her do push ups. I told her my favorite quote is by a man named Henry Ford. He said, "If you think you can or you think you can't, You're right."

Then I had everyone look at me. I told them each morning when they are getting dressed, I want them to look at themselves in the mirror and say this, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." And if during the day you come upon something that is hard, say it again, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." 

We practiced a few times then we started our lesson. It was the story of Daniel being faced with having to not only tell Nebuchadnezzar what his dream meant but also what the dream was.

God is amazing!

Now it's your turn. Repeat after me, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." If you are racking your brain trying to remember where it's found. It's Philippians 4:13.

Philippians 4:13 (KJV)
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

    

Have A Blessed Day,

Mama D

The verse the Lord gave me this morning in my devotion was Romans 8:31. 

Romans 8:31 (NIV)
What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us who can be against us?

BE CONTENT IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES

     My devotion this morning was to be content in whatever the circumstances, from the book of Philippians. As I get older, I've found I am more content with my life than I was when I was younger. I have enjoyed my life, each stage has had it challenges and positives.
     God has truly blessed me. Even though being blessed I used to let myself worry quite a bit. So much so I would have panic attacks, and headaches.
     I know what you are thinking. It is easier to be content when you get older. Life is just slower and easier. That may be the case in some people's lives but for myself, the last few years have been challenging.
     A little more than three years ago I lost my job. I decided I didn't want to go to my next job and sit at the desk and think I wish I had done this or that. I started cleaning, organizing and working on the house. We owned a 3100 square foot house. It was nice and we loved it.
     I started cleaning and putting Quick Shine on the hardwood floors in the living room. I then started to move to the dining room. My husband said, "Don't you think we should wait until we strip the wallpaper off the walls and paint the room before you do the floors."

Such a beautiful shine!

     When Kev came home from work, he asked, "What are you doing?" I told him I was getting everything out of the room so I could work on the walls. We (mostly me, Kev was at work) stripped the wall paper, clean the wall and painted. The room looked great. After the floors were done we decided to make it our office and to add the dining room furniture in the large living room. We had talked about taking the wall out between the kitchen and the living room. So we decided to leave the dining room set up in the living room to see if we liked it.
      We decided to make the old dining room an office. The existing office was moved downstairs and we made two work areas. I needed room to work on the book I had started after losing my job.

Danette hard at work

     Next was the main floor guest room, hall, kitchen... You get the idea. Kev and the guy at the home improvement store got to know each other pretty well.
     All this time I was putting out my resume and praying for a job. I went on some interviews. The interviews seem to go well but no job offers. I took a part time afternoon receptionist position. I loved my job and I was praying and believing that my book would make up the rest of the finances we needed.
     We put our beautiful home up for sale. We found a smaller house closer to the church (Kev's the pastor), and my job. I am working with a team at church to develop the children's programs for Sunday morning and Wednesday night. God gave a full time job in December of 2015.

      We were and are still renovating the smaller home. We moved in January of 2017.
We also had the everyday things. Making sure the larger house was in order to be shown when I left for work in case the realtor called, laundry, dishes, etc. Forgot to mention that I made two 1841 costumes for our church's 175th anniversary. They won prizes at the State Fair which was a positive experience for sure.
   So, I wouldn't say my life is easier than when I was younger. I just think, I've learn to trust God more. I used to give my worries to God and then take them back again. Now I don't take them back so quickly. That's not to say I don't think about all the things facing us.
   I knew the house would sell in God's time. I was hoping God's time would have been much sooner but it wasn't. But it did sell and we love our new home. I believe I will finish my book and it will get published. I believe God will take care of our financial, mental, physical, and spiritual needs. I believe this because it didn't matter how much I worried in the past, God took care of us! Worrying didn't speed up the process. But it just took a lot of the joy out of the waiting time.
    Do I still wonder when and how? Oh yes, but I am content where I am. I choose to look at the positives in my life; my loving husband, my daughter and her husband, my family, my new job, the kids at church, my book, and the plans I have for my new home.

    So, if your life is crazy! If you are worried about what's next. Remember, BE CONTENT IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES! Let yourself enjoy today!

    My daddy told me when Arielle was young, "If I knew my favorite time of life was going to be when you kids were young and life was crazy. I would have let myself enjoy it more."

   That is my wish for you, That you will let yourself enjoy each stage of your life. Look for those positives and be content.

Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

Philippians 4:11 (NIV)
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

CARNIVAL FANTASY - FIRST DAY AT SEA

FIRST DAY AT SEA: Woke up. I sleep my best on cruises. I don't know if it's the movement of the boat or that there's no schedule to keep, all the junk in my head goingon, having to switch the laundry, clean this, clean that, work, etc, etc. The stuff of life slows way down or goes away for just a few days.  Kev went to take pictures of the sunrise and make new friends. I like to sleep past 6:15 on vacation so I turned my alarms off and rolled over as Kev left the room.

HERE IT COMES

YOU CAN JUST SEE IT

ALMOST...

AND IT'S UP, LET'S START THE DAY!

He came back from his morning walk. I dressed and we went to breakfast. We love to sit at the back of the boat and watch the ocean especially when we're at sea because it's so peaceful. We've never eaten in the dining room at breakfast. We plan to try that, one morning on this cruise. 

After breakfast we found a seat. One with an umbrella. I brought a small black umbrella just in case. I didn't want to get overheated. Been there done that. I started making notes for my Blogs of this trip. Kev always brings books he wants to read. We are also people watchers. I love to see ladies outfits.

Could Rain be coming...not on vacation

Kev loves to read in the sun

Most of the day is spent watching the water, drinking iced tea and a nap here and there. Did I mention I love cruising.

Met Arielle and Jaron for lunch then back to my umbrella and ocean.

About 6:00 we got a piece of pizza then we made an ice cream cone. It's fun to watch people make their own cones. On a couple of our cruises we sat and graded the people making cones. You can tell those that worked at Dairy Queen, McDonalds or had an ice cream machine at college. There's are always beautiful. Everyone else's are can I say, "works of art". Once we saw a kid probably 10. He made a small cone walked off came back made another small cone and then again. Okay we had to ask, "Are all those for you?" He said, "Yes, I make one eat it while I walk around the ship and then come back." Pretty smart walk off what you're eating before getting another. We sat and ate ours. After all we were on vacation.

Time for a nap. Our dinner time is 8:15pm.

Nothing could be better...cool room, nap time and my favorite cartoon
LIFE IS GOOD!

I love to dress up for dinner. As a kid, I was a tomboy, but after I got my first pair of stilettos, that changed. I love to dress up. Kev, not so much but he will do it for me.

Dinner on a Cruise

Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

Genesis 1:1-3 (NIRV)
In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth didn't have any shape. And it was empty. Darkness was over the surface of the ocean. At that time, the ocean covered the earth. The Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. God said, "Let there be light." And there was light.

"And God saw that the light was good"

CARNIVAL FANTASY: THE ADVENTURE BEGINS

THE ADVENTURE BEGINS

Charleston is a beautiful place. As a former architectural draftsman I love the homes and buildings. They are amazing. As we drove around we saw areas that reminded us of Richmond and New Orleans. The painted ladies reminded us of San Francisco. But Charleston I would say is a place to see, for itself even if you haven't been to Richmond, New Orleans or San Francisco.  Because Charleston has spanish moss. Its like taking areas from other places and kicking them up a notch. I love spanish moss. Charleston was where we met our ship, now it will have to be a vacation of its own one day!

And so the next phase of our adventure began, we drove around the town and found the Cruise Terminal. Drove around some more and found the best way from the hotel. We planned to leave the car at the terminal for the week. If you know someone that lives near the terminal or you are coming from the airport there's a separate line for you and your luggage to be dropped off.

The next morning we saw signs that read "Cruise Traffic" that weren't there the day before. We had our cruise papers ready, well after Jaron jumped out and got our backpack out of the back of the truck. Best laid plans sometimes have a few glitches.

There's the ship! Look close.

Like I've told my husband for years, vacation starts when work ends. He used to think vacation started when we got to our destination. That made for a stressful day of packing and travel. Now that it's all part of vacation it allows us to roll with the punches. (This took years of saying, "We're on vacation. It's okay!")

So when we realized the papers when in the back - we all laughed. Jaron jumped out and got the back pack and we were back on course.

As we were going along the path created with orange cones, one lady was all business, no smile, no chit chat, just here's your information. That's okay, she wasn't ugly. She was doing her job, and she kept the line moving.

The four of us were discussing if we were in the correct line to leave our truck. Kev asked the next person which made sure we were in the correct line. The truck was going to be parked in a huge building for the week. Now that was reassuring. Not that we were going to leave anything valuable in the truck but it was still reassuring.

Another person told us where to drop off our luggage before getting to the building. We dropped our luggage off at a tent. Kev and Jaron got out to unload the luggage. If you read my"Vacation Packing Checklist" Blog you know we had TRAVEL BAGS and CRUISE BAGS". This is where the guys had organized the back of the truck and knew where the CRUISE BAGS were. You may have heard, "Too many cooks in the kitchen ..." Well, in my opinion, too many people packing and unpacking a vehicle can cause much stress. Maybe in your family the wife likes to do the packing and unpacking of the vehicle "That's Okay". In my family, we let the men do it.

When we got to the building there was a person to show us where to park. We got out, took our carryon bags and papers then proceeded to the terminal. We talked to people along the way. (Because That is the Moen way! "There are no strangers, only friends we haven't met yet!" That took this shy girl from the county years to learn.)

Some groups had matching T-shirts. I loved the Bridal party that had black shirts with rhinestone words that read "Bride's Entourage". Arielle is not fond of matching T-Shirts, but I love them.

It was amazing how fast the line went.

CRUISE TIP: When two couples are traveling together - when you get to the end of the line in the terminal and the person asks, "How many in your party?"  tell him two. Unless of course, you live at the same address. This will get you out at about the same time.

The person at the checkin took our papers, looked to see if we checked that we had a runny nose, scratchy throat in the last few days. Our daughter marked yes. Ragweed had bloomed and her allergies had gone crazy. The lady behind the desk walked away. When she came back she said allergies don't count. She took our pictures for our Sail and Sign cards then sent us on our way.

After leaving the checkin we were directed to the gangway. We walked up and around., we passed a few people that had stopped for a minute. And then, There it was CARNIVAL FANTASY! I love a cruise!

 We put our  "Sail and Sign" card into the machine. We took off our hats and sunglasses. The crew member checked to make sure we matched the picture on the card and we were on. Next step put our carryon through an X-ray machine. Our water was checked very closely. We learned later that water bottles may not be allowed much longer - the tea drinker that I am never thought about putting something stronger in my water bottles. That's okay, I can take or buy a cup w/ a lid to put water in to carry with me.

We were cleared! Now we were free to explore the ship. Lunch was ready on the Lido deck. But first we wanted to see if our rooms were ready.

One of my first jobs was working at Fort Caswell Baptist Assembly, in North Carolina. I cleaned the  Driftwood Hotel, and worked in the kitchen and the Drift Inn store. Knowing just a few hours ago this ship was full of other guests amazes me how quickly they can roll over the ship.

Because we were told our room would be ready by 1:30 and it was close to that, we went to check on our rooms. They were ready and we put our carryon luggage down and proceeded to the Lido Deck.

We ate our lunch. I may have been on vacation but I decided not to blow the eating plan completely. I made a salad and had chicken. Most of the potions on the ship were small. So to get a dessert on the Lido Deck is not like an eighth of a cake it a small square, there's jello squares, tiny cupcakes, etc. There small but you can have whatever you want. And of course, ice cream all the time.

We sat on the outside deck. A man several tables down started to feed the sea gulls. Arielle said loud enough for him to hear her. PLEASE DON'T! WE ARE TRYING TO EAT AND IF YOU FEED THAT ONE IT WON'T BE LONG BEFORE 50 SHOW UP! He was kind enough to stop.

He looks so sweet but.....Please don't feed the seagulls!

After we finished lunch we took our plates in. You can leave them on the table, a crewman will clean it up shortly but that wouldn't' have been fair to those coming out after us. Seagulls are not a problem once out to sea, just at the ports. If you don't want to clean off your table, lay the cloth napkin over the leftovers. This may not stop them but it will delay the inevitable.

Next was the Emergency Evacuation Meeting at our  muster station. The "Sail and Sign" cards had our location on them. This is mandatory. It is also reassuring to those like me that love the water but can't swim well. Its good to know they have a plan. Several people showed how the life vests worked. Then we went to where our life boat was. Soon a horn blew and we were on our way.

Lastly, one of our favorite things is going to the front and watching the ship leave the port. For someone that's not a great swimmer, I do LOVE a Cruise!

This was from a cruise where we had a balcony.

Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

Hebrews 4:10 (NIRV)
God rested from His work. Those who enjoy God's rest also rest from their work.

Vacation Packing Checklist

THE WEEK BEFORE VACATION

The week before vacation: start pulling clothes from the closet and the clothes basket. This can be a chair or an open suitcase. 

I like to make a list of each day. I've looked at the lists on Pinterest. They are a good starting point. I give each day a label, this helps me make my plan:

                     - Travel Day

                     - Sightseeing Day

                     - Pool/ or Beach Day

I don't know about you but my husband says several times before the trip, "I don't want to overpack this trip".

This is understandable because he is the one to carry, wheel, pack the car, unpack the car, wheel the suitcases into the hotel, airport, etc. So I try very hard to not overpack.

Pre Trip NIGHT: Thursday; Daughter's house (After work and stopping by church) - Sleep Clothes

DAY 1: Friday; TRAVEL DAY - Clothes to ride in   {Tooth brush, tooth paste, vitamins, make up, make up remover, deodorant, small bottle of polish remover, clear polish, SUNSCREEN, head bands, hair clamps, hat, whatever you use to put your hair up in the sun or wind, etc. THESE ARE FOR EACH DAY}

NIGHT 1: Friday night; HOTEL - Take in TRAVEL BAG - Sleep clothes (Clothes for hotels before and after cruise)

folding and stacking clothes to use from suitcase

DAY 2: Saturday, TRAVEL DAY - Clothes for the Cruise Port and the 1st day on the ship

Leave the travel bag in the vehicle and take the VACATION BAGS - Clothes for the cruise

NIGHT 2: Saturday; Dinner clothes for the Dining Room (Dressy)

DAY 3: Sunday: ALL DAY AT SEA - Bathing Suit, Cover up, Skort and Blouse, undies

NIGHT 3: Sunday: Dinner on the Cruise Ship (Dress Up Night) Back long dress, heels, jewelry   

using pants hanger for 5 outfits

attaching store hangers to one another

DAY 4: Skort and Blouse, undies, bathing suit
NIGHT 4: Monday: Dinner on the Cruise Ship (I like to dress up, no jeans) It is my opinion, if you don't want to dress up maybe eat somewhere besides the Dining room. Let's face it, it's getting harder and harder to go out to eat a nice dinner like on a date without someone sitting next to you in jeans. I know you have the right to wear jeans but why make everything in life that's affordable casual. Why can't some things that are affordable stay special. Not everyone can afford to go to $100.00 dinners. End of my rant.

DAY 5: EXCURSION DAY: Skort and tank top., undies, ( You may have noticed I don't wear shorts very often. I've noticed on me one side rides up and that makes me self conscience.) 

        We don't always take excursions but Kev found one in a glass bottom submarine. The brochure said approximately 2 hours. 

NIGHT 5: Dinner on the Cruise Ship- Cotton long dress, sandles, jewelry 

DAY 6: DAY AT PORT: Skort and TankTop SUNSCREEN!, Bathing suit and cover up, on the ship after going to shore for alittle shopping.

NIGHT 6: Dinner on Cruise Ship- Cotton long dress, jewelry 

DAY 7: DAY AT SEA: Bathing suit and cover up, Skort and blouse, undies, if raining or no sun

NIGHT 7: Dinner on the Cruise Ship, long cotton dress ( can wear one from another night)

           Pack up suit cases to put in the hall for pick up. Save clothes to wear tomorrow to get off the ship and travel. 

           Last time we caught a plane home so we chose to have our suitcases taken from the ship to the airport. We filled out the necessary form. We sat our suitcases outside our room and the next time we saw them was at the Richmond airport. That was cool!

DAY 8: TRAVEL DAY- Skort and Tank Top, undies - Pack up toiletries and anything  else that wasn't put in the bags last night. (we ended up buying a cheap beach bag to carry on shore and to carry souvenirs to car.)

NIGHT 8: HOTEL - Bathing suit, clothes for dinner, slacks and a pink blouse and pink and white long sleeve blouse, Sleep clothes, jewelry  

DAY 9: HOTEL - Reuse Skort with clean red, white and blue plaid blouse, bathing suit

NIGHT 9: Grey pants, teal blouse, sleep clothes

DAY 10: TRAVEL DAY: Skort and tank top, undies

HOME SWEET HOME: As good as Vacation is it's always good to get home!  

A FEW LAST MINUTE TIPS:

         1.) During your trip, if you will empty one suitcase into the drawers, use that suitcase for dirty clothes. This way when you get home that suitcase goes to the laundry room. I use most all my clothes at least once so the ones that don't stink or have a stain on them stay in the clean pile until I get home. 

         2) When we go to the beach for a few days or a week we will stay in a house with a washing machine. I take the laundry sheets or pods and wash them before I leave.

        

THE RICHMOND YOUTH SYMPHONY

Recently, my husband and I, along with several friends attended the Richmond Youth Symphony. One of the violin players is a member of our church. He and his family have been friends of ours for several years.

This young man was actually the Concert Master (the one that helped the others get in tune). I didn't know what that was until that night.

I truly enjoyed the music. It was soothing and comforting.

I have always been a nervous person. I didn't know that everyone didn't feel their heart beating or pounding all the time until several years ago. Little things made me nervous, like forgetting a book at home. I would have a panic attack until I got to class. Then I was terrified to tell the teacher. I was a good student but the teacher saying we were going to have a pop quiz put a knot in my stomach, even if I knew all the answers.

Once in college my professor gave us a few minutes to go over our notes with a partner. There was an odd number of students so the professor asked me questions from my notes. I got them all right. He passed out the test. It looked a lot like my notes. I got the test and just went blank. I only got a few right. He said,"Danette, you answered them all just a minute ago." I told him, "tests just do that to me."

As I got older and had a kid I realized that music with a lot of bass also made me nervous. I could get in the car in a great mood and get out 10 minutes later in a very fowl mood. It could sometimes take me the rest of the day and some of the next to get myself together.

The music at the symphony was wonderful. I wish I had known how calming it could be when I was young. It reminded me of King David  before he was king. When he was growing up he played a harp. A small hand held one from  pictures I've seen. He played to the sheep and later to King Saul.

King Saul "had an evil spirit" come upon him. Someone suggested they get a person to come play soothing music to him to calm the spirit.

Almost everyone likes music. I'm a preacher's wife and I love Southern Gospel, praise music and other Christian music. Christmas music has always been my favorite. It drives me crazy when radio announcers  play Christmas music for a month and start complaining. I have to listen to what they like 11 months out of the year! My favorite artist is Dolly Parton.

But now I will start to listen to instrumental music more. I really enjoyed it. It was calming and exciting at the same time.

Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

1 Samuel 16:18 NAS  Then one of the young men answered,"Behold I have see a son of Jesse the Bethlehemite who is a skillful musician, a mighty man of valor, a warrior, one prudent in speech and a handsome man; and the Lord is with him."

THE TRIUMPHANT ENTRY

Now that life is slowing down from the Easter season, I thought I would take time to share some of the God moments that I noticed.

The Triumphant Entry was portrayed by the children of Concord Baptist Church on Palm Sunday. The room was full of people waving palm leaves. The children came in the front door and waited for the right time to take their places. There were a couple of young boys that seemed to me to get very nervous. One told me when we were in the fellowship hall getting ready that he didn't think he wanted to do it. I told him that I would let him wear a costume and when we take our places he could stand beside his grandma. When Jesus passed he could join in and go on stage with his brother or sit quietly next to his grandma. I would be happy with whatever he decided to do. He decided after standing next to his grandma that he could do it. He joined the procession behind Jesus and went to the stage. (A God moment) The other child was younger. I noticed as we were standing behind the congregation that he was standing in the middle of taller children and beginning to get nervous. When I got to him he wanted his mom. I picked him up and he calmed down. (A God moment) I think it can be very stressful to be in the middle of a crowd and everyone is taller than you. I told him I would walk with him down the isle after everyone else and if he still wanted to go to his mom he could go to her then. After a few minutes the children took their places along both sides of the isle.

They waved their palm leaves as Jesus rode the donkey past them. The children laid the palms on the floor before Jesus. As Jesus passed they fell in the line behind him and followed him to the front of the church. 

The children lined up on the platform. Jesus got off the donkey (his dad) and joined the others then they sang. They did just as they were asked. They didn't play or fidget, they sang with their hands down by their sides. (A God moment) I was so proud! During all the practices some wanted to sway, put their hands in the air like me and count with their fingers the times we repeated a phrase, or just look around. Basically be children.

As they began to sing their voices filled the sanctuary with the sweetest sound, singing Alleluia to the Prince of Peace. The finale was three of our teenage girls singing a song while the others sat on the front pew.

Palm Sunday "The Triumphant Entry"

A little background information that I saw as a God thing. You may believe in coincidences. For instance, the little boy playing Jesus at Easter, was a donkey at Christmas. His mom transformed a brown knit hat into donkey ears. She said she couldn't find a child's size in brown so she bought an adult one. Fast forward to our children's Easter Play. We needed a person to play the donkey. Of course, I had plenty of volunteers from other children. I wanted someone a little older and bigger. 

His dad is in charge of our audio visual ministry at Concord Baptist Church so I didn't ask him. Later he came to me and said he would do it. When we were talking about his costume, I was told about a foam head that had been used several years ago. I found the head and took it upstairs. I was concerned because the head was made for an adult. It was almost as big as the child playing Jesus. 

The boy's mom entered the room as I was looking at the head.  I told her, I like the head but I think it will get laughs because it's almost as big as her son. I don't want laughs as Jesus is entering. Unless it's because the children are just too cute.  She said she would take care of her husband's costume. After all she already had the ears because the ones that her son wore at Christmas could fit her husband. 

That is were I said, "I shouldn't be surprised. God knew then that we would need them to fit an adult now! (A God moment) GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME!" 

The children and our donkey did a Great Job! I am so proud of them! I am proud and thankful for the lady playing the piano and teaching us the songs. And the parents that helped with the practices. I am also proud of the ladies that helped me with the costumes!

At Cinderella's Closet, (a ministry of our church that provides gowns for girls that need them for Prom) I mentioned I needed more bible costumes for the Triumphant Entry. The lady that works with the gowns and the girls to make sure each gown fits perfectly volunteered to make some. Two other young ladies volunteered to make some. I had asked for fabric from the Wednesday night bible study group and some had been brought the to me the Saturday of Cinderella's Closet. Perfect timing. (A God moment)

While we were working on the gowns someone mentioned several gowns had been thrown away because of stains, holes or just out of date. I went to the trash can and pulled out those gowns and then several other dresses were brought to us. Gowns are made with alot of fabric. Some of our children wore tunics and head wraps made from the gowns. A couple of costumes were made from pillow cases. The ladies cut a head hole and two arm holes from the closed end of a pillow case. Amazing! From Cinderella's Closet to the Triumphant Entry! GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME! 

It took alot of time, talent and volunteers to make this 10 minute children's production. You may ask if it was worth it. I believe so. God can use us all. Besides many parents and church members telling me how much they enjoyed seeing the children. The children were able to learn to step outside their comfort zones and use their talents and abilities. And then there's always the things God does that we didn't expect.

The next day our Minister of Music told me he knew who was going to play the donkey. He knew he was the dad of the child playing Jesus. He said what he didn't know is the impact watching the father carry the son through the waving palms and to the front of the church toward him would make on him. (A God moment)

We thought we were teaching children about Jesus coming into Jerusalem. And helping the church celebrate the beginning of Holy Week. 

God used a simple children's play to remind us Jesus is His Son! And he loved Him like our father loves his son! And God loves us so much that He gave His son for us!

WOW!

Have a Blessed Day,

Mama D

John 3:16

For God so loved the world He gave His only begotten Son that Whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

Giving an Allowance

When I was growing up we were expected to help around the house AND at the family business. It was considered family responsibility. Once I remember someone in the family asking about an allowance because someone at school mentioned they got an allowance. Mom said, "Did you eat today? Did you have clean clothes to wear? There's your allowance." End of conversation! Wasn't said, or meant to be ugly. That was reality...

The first time I remember hearing someone talk about getting an allowance my younger sister and I were working at a summer camp. We roomed together. One night we heard a couple of girls in the next room complaining because they only got $50.00 a month (1970s) for allowance. My sister and I just looked at one another, and mouthed $50.00. WOW!

Later in the conversation the girls talked about how they had to buy all their clothes, shoes and things with the allowance.

My parents took care of those things. The three of us girls older girls and cousins were about the same age and size. We shared clothes. And the clothes mom made for us she made sure to make them in different styles because there was a good chance my younger sister would be wearing all three. (My younger sister worried if the clothes she really liked would make it past me. I was a tom boy.)

Some families can't... or decide not to give an allowance... and that's okay. Parents need to discuss their thoughts on giving an allowance without the children around. Whatever the parents agree on goes. There should be no "Well, dad (or mom) doesn't think you should get an allowance."

I think an allowance is a privilege not a requirement. If you are not teaching the child how to handle that money like tithe and savings along with the spending, then why are you giving an allowance in the first place?

My opinion, if you are just giving money without any planned training, you are setting your child up for a harder time when they are older. No one will just hand them money when they are on their own. They are going to have to work for it.


Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

Hebrews 12:7 (NIRV)
Put up with hard times. God uses them to train you. He is treating you as children. What children are not trained by their parents?

Using a chart for chores

My last Blog was on using index cards for chores. As our family grew we needed a way to keep up with the chores. For a little over a year we had foster daughters. I designed the chart to make sure everyone was treated the same.


 On the chart it had the girls' names along the top of the columns and the chores along the left side. I put the days they were responsible for the job under each child's name. I think it was covered with clear contact paper so I could use a dry erase marker.

Sample Job/ Chore List

I couldn't find the original. After all it's been 20 years. This is a recreation as best I can remember of how the chart looked.

 On Saturday we would give the girls their allowance in one dollar bills. Then we went to the chart. For every unaccomplished chore they had to give us  .50 back (or a portion of their allowance back.)

It wasn't long before they realized they had family responsibilities and we expected them to be done. When everyone did their part there was less to do on Saturday.

Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

Colossians 3:23-24 (NIV)
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Using Index Cards for chores

When I was a stay at home mom, I handled the house and Kev handled the yard and cars. Even tho I was at home, I remembered having to help around the house when I was growing up. I wanted Arielle to be able to take care of herself if she needed to. I decided to give her some chores. I didn't think it was fair to just have index cards for her so I made them for all of us.



I started using index cards when Arielle was in kindergarten or First Grade.  They sat on the table next to our plates.

One of Kev's cards

I think it's funny that the only cards I could find were Kev's. This card was dirty so I erased the stains. The card read: *Everyone will help cook. *Everyone will help clean after meals until finished. *If you dirty a dish during the day it is your responsibly to see to it, it gets in the dishwasher. *Sweep *Mop

This card was from when Arielle was in the First through Third Grades. I can tell because it has a dishwasher. You may be thinking, that will take too long because they are too little to do that. And they want do it like I want it done.You are right. It does take longer. And do not resweep, remake the bed, etc.  (Talk about hard.) We had one of those little kid brooms for Arielle, and her bed had the covers crooked for awhile but she kept trying to get better without me redoing everything she did.

If you start a routine when they are young, then when they are older it is already part of the routine. Try to tell a teenager you have to help clean the table, make your bed, help with the laundry, you get the idea, if you have always done it for them.

As Arielle got older and our lives got busier we went in and out of being organized. Sometimes the house took a back seat to school, work, church and sports. Then I'd have a meltdown (yes she DID- Kev!!!) and we start again. Don't give up - PRAY, Pray some more, and then get up and try again.

We are not perfect. My daughter wanted me to start blogging because she thought that something I write may help people her age. I do hope this blog helps young families. Don't give up. Today your house may be a mess or you may be overwhelmed with everything. Try making index cards or your version of index cards. When we had foster girls I had a chart on the kitchen door. I will have to tell you about the chart another time.

Don't give up -  Get up and try again. Remember if you do everything when they are growing up you will be exhausted and they will not know how to boil water when they are on their own. (Better to be upset with you now, than when they are on their own.)

Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

Proverbs 22:6 (NIV)
Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

Moments not days, weeks or years

After the Visitor card night, Kev took it one step farther for his family. Kev started Father Daughter Day. Every Saturday they let me sleep in and off they went. They would sometimes invite me but it was for them. It was also for me. It gave me some time to rest, sew, crochet, etc by myself.

After I started working full time again we went to having Family Night. By now Kev was a Senior Pastor in King William, VA. Nothing could trump Family night except Weddings, funerals and church wide functions. (Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, etc when I owned the florist)

We now have Date Night. Arielle is married and lives a couple of hours or so away. Date nights had been eating out and going to get groceries before Arielle and Jaron moved to Virginia. And it still is sometimes. You don't have to spend alot of money just plan to do something together.

 It is Kev and I again and the rules are a little different. We will spend Date Night going to see Arielle and Jaron, going out with friends, etc. But now it isn't even written on a calendar. It is what we do and everyone knows it.

I think when something is important to you, you can find a way to fit it in your calendar. Children and family should be one of those things that is important. Years ago I heard or read that we do not remember days, weeks or years, we remember moments. So make the moments special.

My mom and dad would take us on a picnic after church sometimes if dad had been working alot  the previous weeks. There would be times when he was gone when we got up or he wasn't home when we went to bed. It wasn't easy for mom to pack up Sunday Dinner in the trunk of the car and take five kids to a park for a picnic. She would pack the pots from the stove into paper bags (to help keep them warm) and boxes. But those are memories I will have my whole life. And memories that made me want Arielle to have good memories too.

The last few weeks we've had some snow. Arielle has been wanting enough to sled in. Last night it started to snow where she lives. She called us about MIDNIGHT, yes MIDNIGHT. (I had responded  to a text from one of my sisters so she THOUGHT we were awake.)

When we hung up Kev said he doesn't know of anyone that loves snow as much as Arielle. I told him, "Well think about it. When she was growing up we always played in the snow as a family. If we didn't have a hill in our yard, you found one and got us to it. We would have hot chocolate, and go back out."

Arielle and Kev at the Cabin

Make happy memories for your kids! Don't always complain about the snow, the shoveling, the cold, etc. Arielle and I were laughing about a time when we were snowed in for a week. We lived in an old log cabin about a 1/4 mile from the road. After a week of being in the house with her dad who had pneumonia. He couldn't do much playing in the snow. We decided we had to help him get out. We thought we would surprise him. She and I went outside and stood in front of the car. She stood in front of one tire and I stood in front of the other. We started walking and packing down the snow as best we could toward the road. About 1/3 of the way down, God sent us an angel in the form of a friend with a 4 wheel drive. He saw us and came down the drive. Kev heard his vehicle and came out. He asked us if he could help. Kev told him he already had just by coming down our driveway. So he went up and down our drive a few more times and we were out.

We learned a valuable lesson that day. Park at the street and walk to the car. Then all we have to shovel is the space in from to the car.

A convoy in the driveway

Like father like daughter

Have a Blessed Day,

Mama D

Philippians 4:13

I can do all this through Him who gives me strength.

The Visitor's Card

When Arielle was three we moved to the Eastern Shore. Kev had taken a position as Minister of Youth and Education. I tried to find a drafting job.

One man shook my hand after the interview and said, "When we need a woman draftsman, we will call you." At another interview the interviewer came in with his sleeves rolled up, a cigar in his mouth and cussed through the whole interview. He didn't call me back either.

There was a positive to not finding a job. Most everyday I would take Arielle for a walk around the town. We lived in Onancock. Our house was just a couple of roads from the Main Street  and the church. We would start by going to the bakery. We usually couldn't afford to buy anything. Before we moved to Onancock we both worked and I made more than Kev. Not, that that mattered. We are married. The scripture says the two become one. All our money goes into the family account. In Onancock we were learning to live on just one salary.

The ladies that worked at the bakery didn't mind us going to say Hi and look at the baked goods. You could smell the bakery from our house. It was like the pied piper calling. Most days if we were early enough  there would be a table full of men having their morning coffee and talking about the old days. They loved talking to Arielle too.

After we left the bakery we would go by the church and get a hug and kiss from daddy before heading to the wharf. We would walk down Main Street past Main Street Cafe and the Post Office. At the end of the street there was a red brick retaining wall. Arielle loved to walk on it. Then we would go across the street to the wharf.  We would see who could find the first crab. Some days I would make us a sandwich and we would have a picnic.

About a month after we got moved in, the Senior Pastor accepted a position in Georgia. Kev did everything he could to support the church during this time. In addition to his duties, he started going to all the meetings, visiting those that were in the hospital and nursing homes, etc. Being a Minister of Youth is a FULL TIME job. Most people think their pastors should be in the office 8 hours a day.  After all, they have to be in their offices. It is my opinion, it should be more important to people to have a pastor and/ or a youth pastor that are with the people. Youth pastors are at ball games, band performances, track, school plays, etc wherever the students are. Students don't just start out going to hang out at the church with the youth minister. A relationship has to be developed. During the months that the church was without a Senior Pastor, Kev was even busier than normal.

 The church built an awesome gym with class rooms around part of the perimeter, restrooms, offices, and a kitchen. On Wednesday nights, Kev and some other adults from the church would open the gym for the youth early to play basketball or hang out. At a given time Kev would have a devotion/ bible study. If the students stayed for that then they could play basketball or hangout for awhile afterwards. I thought it was pretty awesome.

After mine and Arielle's classes were over we would go to the new building to say goodnight to her daddy. I would walk Arielle over, she would start walking in the gym towards her dad. He would walk towards her while still teaching the youth. When they met he would pick her up kiss her and tell her goodnight. Then he would turn around and start back teaching. Arielle would come back to me and we headed home. We did stay to help with overnighters, special projects but the everyday schedule was we went home.

The day came when the new pastor arrived. One of the things he thought would help the church was to have a night of visitation. He decided Thursday night would be good because it was the night the Youth Minister was free.

I think it was three months, maybe not that long, of Kev not being home at night before Arielle went to bed that I decided something had to give. One Thursday night before he left to go to visitation I slipped a visitor's card into his pocket. (You knew I'd get around to it sooner or later, didn't you.) We kissed him goodnight. I told him a member of the church (which I was) wanted him to take this card to the meeting. He said when he got there, he took the card out of his pocket. The card read, "Danette and Arielle Moen would like a visit from the Minister of Youth and Education."

Kev came home a little while later. Better than that, the deacons brought it up at their next meeting. They decided, if they wanted their pastors to respect the time they had with their families then the church family needed to respect the pastors and their families. It was decided that all meetings would be held on Sunday night and one other night of the week. I'm not saying it didn't take some work. People had to make some hard choices if they were on a lot of committees.

We have to work in this life to pay the bills, eat, have a car and a house.  But we must remember our children are a gift from God. We should not take them for granted. I tell people with small children crying in stores, "Enjoy this time too. Soon they will be married and living 12 1/2 hours away." You laugh, but wait you will see how fast time flies if you have a little one or have family members or friends that have little ones.

My daddy told me once when Arielle was small, "Danette, if I knew my favorite time of life was going to be those days when you kids were young and life was crazy. I would have made myself slow down and enjoy it more."

Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

Psalms 127:2-3 NLT
 2It is useless for you to work so hard from early morning until late at night, anxiously working for food to eat; 3Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

EVERYTHING IS RELATIVE

My husband and I met the summer of '78 before his senior year in college. He was a summer youth director for a church down the road from us. He and his college roommate were staying with a former youth minister of mine for the summer. My sisters and I saw our former youth minister at Burger King and he told us that one of his "tenants," was having a pool party for his youth group and that we were invited. I had to work but one of my sisters decided she would go.

When I got home from work our living room was full of people. There was my sister, our former youth minister and three summer youth directors. Kevin was one of them. We met in June. We started dating the middle of July and he asked me to marry him in August. Not as fast a romance as some we've met, not as long as others but perfect timing for us.

We had talked about getting married in December and having a Christmas wedding. Kev told his dad the plans. His dad said, "That's great! I will be there. Just tell me when." then he added, "Remember, you have one more semester of college left and when you say" I Do" the rest is on you." We decided to wait until May. Kev wanted his dad to come to our wedding but he also wanted him to come to his college graduation. Kev didn't think his dad could get off work twice in one year to fly from California to North Carolina. I suggested we get married the Sunday after his college graduation. Kev liked that idea. His dad flew in for his graduation on May 20th and stayed the week. He went to the wedding on  May 27th and flew out that evening.

While Kev was in college we would call each other and let the phone ring once then hang up.That meant "I love you!" It's funny after 35 years of marriage every time I hear any phone ring just once I think of Kev.

One month after we got married we moved to California. Kev went to Golden Gate Seminary and I went to work in San Francisco. I would call my mom, dad, brother and baby sister one Saturday of the month, my other sisters, Grandma Humphrey, and Grandma Richardson each on another Saturday.  My Grandma Richardson said the same thing each of her Saturdays, she said,"It's great to hear your voice. I know this is costing a lot so I will let you go.  I love you." I would reply, "I love you too, grandma." Then we'd hang up. (Now I can talk to my daughter anytime I want, as long as she answers! :) Everything is relative.)

Kevin and Danette_2014

Jaron and Arielle_2014

I didn't really want a cell phone. My husband wanted me to have one because I'm directionally challenged and at the time I owned a florist. I made a lot of deliveries. I got turned around (lost) several times. There was no GPS as we know it today. I had a disk that had the information on it. Unfortunately it wasn't always right. The day that sealed the fate of me getting a cell phone even though I didn't want one, was a delivery that left me on a dirt road in a corn field. The map showed two roads connecting but they didn't connect.  I could see the headlights from the cars on the other road through a cornfield. Because the florist was an hour from our home Kev was concerned and thought with a cell phone I could at least call the florist if I got lost.

Arielle and I shared the phone. I used it during the day while at work. Arielle used it in the evening when the minutes were free. Unfortunately for her the only place it worked at home was in the middle of the driveway. She would sit in a chair in the middle of the driveway until time for bed. (Of course, homework had to be done first.)

A couple of years later Arielle went to college. She went to North Greenville College in Tigerville, S.C. It was 7 1/2 hours from us. She took our cell phone. (She was more popular than I was.) I got another one.

The first week she was in college she called me at work. She said, "I just saw the funniest bill board." Then she described it to me and we laughed together. Then she said, "That's all. I knew I'd forget if I waited until later." We hung up and I turned to my designer and said, "I LOVE this phone!" (Everything is relative.)

Arielle has lived 12 1/2 hours away from us for about 5 years now. We've kept in touch by cell phone. A month ago she and her husband moved to Virginia. They are about 2 1/2 hours away. Last week we met for dinner. It was a Saturday night. That's amazing in itself because we never go far from home on a Saturday night. Kev always says, "It's Saturday night and Sunday's coming." (Everything is relative)

We each drove half way and met in the middle. Over an hour to go to dinner used to sound nuts!!!! Now (If it's the kids) it's a JOY. Get a couple of hugs, dinner, laughs, another couple of hugs and on the road for over an hour to home. We used to have to plan a week's vacation to see her (them). (EVERYTHING IS RELATIVE!)




Have a BLESSED Day,
Mama D

Ephesians 3:1 ESV
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.

A Smooth Move

WOW!  What a couple of months I've had.

Christmas was awesome! Arielle and Jaron came home from Georgia. We went to Kevin's sister's house for our Moen Christmas. Great fun! Then Christmas Day we headed to North Carolina for our Humphrey Christmas. My family is spread out from Georgia to Virginia so Christmas is the time of year we all (as many of us that can) get together in North Carolina.

Two days after Christmas I went home with Arielle and Jaron. Arielle accepted a position in Clarksville, VA and Jaron also had a couple of job offers before they even left Georgia. I must admit I did pick on him a bit about getting a couple of job offers in a matter of days when his mother-in-law has been putting in applications since last February.

Kev was in charge of our dog and their dog back home in Virginia.

Arielle and Jaron both had to work the first part of the week so I started packing. They had started a little before I got there. We went to the store and bought boxes, cardboard for the temporary storage items and plastic for the items that could be more permanently stored.

We also bought duct tape. Arielle had read on Pinterest that to make moving easier, use different colored duct tape on the boxes.

Colored Duct Tape

Boxes labeled and duct tape

I have always numbered and labeled my moving boxes. Some of the boxes I helped Arielle label on a previous trip to her house, like Christmas boxes. We taped a small craft plastic bag (Ziplock type) to a plastic box and put an index card or half of an index card according to the size of your bag, in the bag with the contents written on it. I don't have a close up view of one of her boxes but a good example would be these boxes from my storage room.

I use different colored index cards. Extension cords are on green, crafts on pink, etc.

I wrote in Arielle's calendar book the number written on the box (mostly paper boxes) or a description of the box like the color of the plastic box's lid and then what was in that box.

Many years ago Kev and I moved for what we thought was going to be a couple of weeks but that turned into 8 months. All our possessions were in a storage space. When we needed something I had a list of the box numbers and what was in the boxes. Had we known how long we were going to be staying with family, I would have suggested we put the boxes in some sorta order in the storage space to make it easier to find. Like putting the winter clothes near the door. I have been making those lists ever since.

List of boxes

Unpacking

Packing the truck

Paper boxes are used for the move with things that will be unpacked soon after the move is done. (I don't like paper boxes in the attic or basement or garage because of potential bugs or mice.) Use small to medium boxes. My husband started this tradition because I fill a box where it sits. I do not worry about it's weight, putting it in a truck or off a truck that is Kev's job (poor thing).

Look at that little ramp supplied on the rental truck in the picture to the left. Believe me small to medium boxes are the best.

Now look at the duct tape on the handles. A person can't say I didn't see the tape.

I made a legend, (from my architectural draftsman days). I also made door hangers for each room. The door hangers were made on 8 1/2 x 11 white card stock . I cut a hole near the middle top. I wrote the name of the room and then put a piece of the colored duct tape below the name of the room along the bottom of the paper. I apologize none of the pictures show the door hangers.
   

Duct Tape Legend

Arielle got everyone together at the new house and explained the system. I stood in the basement to organize the boxes that went there. I didn't want them to have a pile of boxes in the middle of the floor after everyone left. I put Christmas and New Year's boxes under the stairs, Craft items together, sports in another corner and Jaron's tools near the back door so he could have natural light and easy access to bring in whatever he needs for his projects.

The rest of the house went smooth also. One lady told me I should be an organizer for a living. I told her Arielle has told me the same thing but I wouldn't know how to get started. She said let them watch me for 10 minutes. We laughed and went back to work. (If I could only organize Kev)

Arielle, Jaron and Jazzy are all moved in

They are all moved in and it's time for Kev and I to go home.

FIVE days after getting home Kev and I left for California to go to his brother's retirement party. I must say we have a great family from the east coast to the west, and as far up as Washington State, families don't get much better than ours. We are not perfect, we don't get to see each other as much as we would like but we love each other and we love our Lord, Jesus Christ.

 We were there for a few days and then came home.

We have put away most of our Christmas, laundry is done from our trips, and we have finally caught up on some much needed sleep.

A few days after we got home I received a call asking me to come in for an interview, then a second interview, and then a call asking me if I would accept the job.

I accepted a part time receptionist position with the (BGAV) Baptist General Association of Virginia. YES! It is good to be back at work. The facility is called the Virginia Baptist Resource Center because several wonderful organizations have their offices there.

Kev asked me how my first day went. I told him it was fun. He said, "fun", you are suppose to be working.

I plan to work on my tweenager bible study book about the life of Joseph in the morning and work in the office in the afternoon.

2015 is LOOKING GOOD and I am truly BLESSED! PRAISE THE LORD!

Have a Blessed Day,
Mama D

Romans 8:28 ESV
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.